One Direction sang a song titled “Half a heart”. It is a song that talks about missing someone else who represents the other half of one’s heart.
Many times romantic songs depict an untrue picture of what we feel when we love another person. I’ve heard girls say, “My heart jolts when I see him, I get weak in the knees, His smile turns my head…” And I begin to wonder what kind of love they proclaim to have. One that makes you feel incomplete. The love song tells you, you possess half a heart without the other person around. This is what I call toxic. I have heard preachers say singles must be completely whole before the get involved with partners. Why would they advocate this? Our half a heart won’t sustain us if they are no longer in our lives, if we always want some one to fill our void, make us happy then we set up ourselves for disaster.
When we cease to see the other partner as half of our heart, then we are able to love them and care for them in a very healthy way. This is when they are inside our hearts instead of being half of our heart. What makes them sad makes us sad, what makes them smile makes us laugh, then our lives are connected in a good way.
This is life and we cannot say these partners of ours will always be with us. Memory loss, terminal illness, and death are a natural facet of life. It makes it easier to deal with than when we make them the other half of our heart.
Dear Romantics, Juliets and Romeos of the world, (s)he is not half of your heart. (S)he is just a part of you deep inside where it really matters.
Written by Deborah Glover, 2016.
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